What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
