at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
