Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
