oh god the rape fog is back!
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Of course I have a pirate flag
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize