i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
