Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
