You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
