It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
