Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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