So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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