Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
birth control should be required to get into college
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
