Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
