dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
