with your own penis?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
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