i just google imaged poop.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Randomize
