would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Are we still banned from the library?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
