I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
