My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
