You work out of a Hotel?
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize