what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
