Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
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