We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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