You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
