I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
