hell yes lets make some ravioli
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
