all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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