hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Panties = found
Randomize
