That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
