I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
operation harelip BJ is a go
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
