This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
