Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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