just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
