mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
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