Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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