saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
