Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
