ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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