Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Randomize
