Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
