Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
