Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
So gin and wine won't be happening again
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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