Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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