i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
