Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
