I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
