I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
