why didn't you poke me back
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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