Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
