I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
