I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
